There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
vagina is talking i cant
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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