Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
he shaved USA in his pubs
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Randomize
