why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
