4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
