After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
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