Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize