So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize