At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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