big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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