I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
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