I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
