Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
