i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
