No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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