We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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