i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
