My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
