I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
My vagina is officially offended.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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