i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
