Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
