you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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