what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
