I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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