i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize