Its about making memories worth repressing
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
