Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
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Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
that may or may not have been my penis.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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