I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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