you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
