I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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