at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
