I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
its not stalking. its research.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize