My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
