I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
