Swine flu. Run for my life!
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I just blew my weed a kiss
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Randomize