Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
