how do flat chested girls get laid?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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