just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
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