Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
