So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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