What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
