Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
