Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Randomize
