I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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