please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Randomize
