Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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