My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.