their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
You left your underwear on the fireplace
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
