I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
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