Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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