they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
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