Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
