I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
